Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Open Letters

Sorry for the snarkiness of this post.  I couldn't resist.  I am feeling feisty today. ha!

Dear Walmart,

Please stop putting huge pallet displays in the middle of your aisles.  Two carts really can't fit through the aisle at one time, and I feel like you must be breaking some major fire codes.

Thank you,
A disgruntled customer

***

Dear Self,
You hate Walmart, remember?  Why do you keep shopping there?

***

Dear Summer,

Why are your days moving by so quickly?  Slow down! I love your hot lazy days.  And I love your days spent by the pool, and softball games at night.  And most importantly, this girl is not ready for grad school to start yet!!!

Sincerely, 
A nervous wreck of a student



***

Dear ABC Family,

You have stolen my evenings with your addicting show, Pretty Little Liars.  I should have never watched that first episode, because now I am hooked for life.  You crazy plot twists, cliffhangers, and cute outfits keep me coming back for more.  However, I would like my life back. 

Love,
A 16-year-old in a 27-year-old's body


***

Dear Facebook friends,

If I am your friend on Facebook, I am probably also following you on Pinterest.  If I want to see what you pinned, I will go to Pinterest.  No need to post what you pinned on your FB wall. 

And while I'm at it, if you don't like something about your life, then do something about it.  Somebody must have told you that posting every little complaint on Facebook would help you solve your problems, but they were sorely mistaken.  It just makes the rest of us want to block you. 

Thanks,
Your overly positive Facebook friend

***

Dear Twitter,

Thanks for being a million times better than Facebook.  You restore my faith in humanity.

*Hugs*

-Jessica

3 comments:

  1. Hahaha! I HATE Walmart! I've been once in the past year because I can't deal with that place anymore! It makes me homicidal.

    And AMEN about Facebook. I deleted mine several months ago and it's been so nice not seeing everyone's complaints and what they had for breakfast.

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  2. Twitter is SO much better than Facebook. I think I'd like Facebook more if everyone and their mother weren't on it...ya know?!

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  3. Agree so much with this entire post!!! : )

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